session recaps, 3/7/2013 and 3/14/2013

CAST
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Mongo the Fighter (4), his henchpersons "Bunny" the Thief (3) and William the Sentinel (2), and his soil-bearers Malazar and someone whose name I have forgotten
Gutboy the Cleric (5), his henchman Trezgar the Elf (1) and his blink dog Rufus II
George P. Burdell the Cleric (4) and his henchmen, Slick Eddie the Thief (2) and Relgar the Elf (1)
Razoe the Fantra Paladin (3) and his henchmen Skwisgar the Elf(1) and Boxer the Fighter (1)

A two-part session recap.

Mongo and Razoe were bumming around Denethix, when the peculiar notion to get rich or die trying in a subterranean hell popped into their minds.  They gathered their henchmen together and headed off to Chelmsfordshire - the first stop on a seasoned traveler's trip to Mt. Rendon and the many deaths lurking beneath it.

At Chelmsfordshire, they saw that many changes had taken place - a large wooden building had been constructed in the town common, craftsmen were busy working on a statue in front of the new building, and the crappy local bar, The Pig's Bride, had a crappy addition tacked on to turn it into a crappy inn.

They entered the building, and saw it packed with prospective henchmen looking to make a quick buck, lining up at tables to interview with various adventuring parties.  The interior of the building had several storefronts within - most unoccupied, with the exception of Fitzy's Adventuring Equipment.  After untold centuries, a shopping mall had returned to the land.  Hooray for progress!

They grabbed a fellow out of line to ask him what was going on - the shlub introduced himself as Barry, a former employee of a box factory in Denethix.  "I'm going to get rich! I heard you can get tens of gold pieces beneath the mountain!" he exclaimed.  The duo pumped "Boxer" for information - the statue was to be of Slezgar, so that no adventurer would ever forget the risks of the dungeon.  Beyond that, he didn't have much useful information - but he did agree to do some henching for Razoe.

Off to the dungeon they went - and the many unhappy looks from the hideously transformed Bunny convinced Mongo to expend some effort trying to locate her face.

First encounter - at the 3rd level entrance to the dungeon, they found a pile of human corpses - city surveyors and Unyielding Fist guardsmen.  Their heads had been taken.  Not too far inside the dungeon, they came across a group of goblins, stirring brains around in a pot.  The goblins explained they were trying to remake Grolikus the Hive Mind.  A look at the decaying brains floating in the pot convinced Mongo to shout out "You're doing it wrong!" before the crew began slaughtering the goblins.

Second encounter - the cod-men were delighted to see the adventurers, and escorted them safely through their lair.  Razoe asked if they had seen the hideous face-stealing monster, and the cod-men reported they had heard someone shouting "I'm pretty! I'm pretty!" deeper in the flooded dungeon.  The location was marked on the party's map.

Third encounter - the party found a section of the 30' wide flooded tunnnel that had several alcoves in the wall.  Ignoring the piles of metal and wires and the ancient graffiti reading "All toothmen must die!", the party poked around at a group of sarcophagi leaning against the back of a ceiling.  A trap was triggered, and the lids crashed open, and hideous seaworm-covered corpses leaped at the players.  Further crashes deeper in the darkness revealed more sarcophagi opening - a total of nine of the fiends attacked Mongo, Razoe, and their hapless minions.  The bloat zombies were felled with the help of Mongo's undead-controlling Sword of Unlife, but "Boxer" was slain and Skwisgar left only semi-conscious with worms burrowing into his flesh.  Skwisgar pleaded for mercy, but the two were unwilling to risk him rising as a bloat zombie at an inconvenient time, and he was beheaded.  Boxer's corpse was treated similarly.  Strangely, Razoe refrained from gutting them to see if they had eaten any treasure.

After this loss, the party retreated back to Denethix, despite Bunny's complaining.  Razoe wandered away to drink away the memories, while Gutboy and George roused themselves from whatever stupor they had fallen into.  George spent a bit of time hiring a new henchie - Relgar the Elf - and then, back to the dungeon!

First encounter - several miles from Chelmsfordshire, they found two perytons picking at a dead farmer.  They charged, they killed, they took a head as a trophy.

Second encounter - back at the third level entrance, they ran into a patrol of the Unyielding Fist.  The guardsmen had erected a gibbet, and a half dozen goblins were swinging by their necks.

Gutboy: "We're citizens of Denethix!"
Fist Lieutenant: "Yeah, we know.  The orange guy, and the talking dog in the hat and cape, and you.  You're legendary!"
Mongo: "That could be anyone."
Gutboy: "Did you know Rufus here is going to run for the council?"
First Lieutenant (awed): "Seriously?  A magic dog?  An Exalted and Chosen Brethren?  Well, let me tell you, he's got the support of this patrol!  Good luck in the tunnels, citizens!  It was an honor meeting you!"

Third encounter - through the cod-men lair and back to the alcoves where the bloat-men were defeated.  No sign of the bodies remained.  Further alcoves revealed a few doors, and a sculpture of a hideous long-tongued face with the words "An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a face for a face" inscribed above it.  Pressing on the tongue opened a secret door, and out ran a hideous monster with a machine embedded in its chest and Bunny's face upon its head.  Shots were taken, but the creature ran off into the dark - and Bunny grabbed a torch and ran after.  The rest of the party joined the pursuit, and they cornered it at the end of a tunnel.  It surrendered in exchange for a promise to "never steal faces again" - after twiddling the knobs on its chest-device, a beam of light shot from the mechanism into Bunny's monster face, and the exchange was reversed.  Bunny then instantly broke her promise and murdered the face-stealing fiend.  The machine was cut away from the corpse in hopes of fetching a few coins in the markets of Denethix.

Fourth encounter - there was a 12' tall statue of an automaton at the end of the tunnel where the face exchanger was killed. The statue resembled the machine-men from the "gatehouse" level of the dungeon.  Its face was removable, and they unscrewed it and took it with them

Fifth encounter - a room with a pedestal, upon which stood a gold statuette of the grim reaper holding a scythe. The statuette was coated in glistening oil or slime.  George made an attempt to towel it off, but a thin layer was still left.  Mongo then instructed William to go get it, but omitted vital details like "just drop this sack over it" - and the contact poison that coated the statue slew the stalwart sentinel when he picked it up.  Ahh, alliteration, it eases the pain.

Sixth encounter - a secret room was found.  This eight-segmented room housed a large fountain, with aqueducts directing water into eight smaller fountains. The water in the smaller fountains took on various odd colors - orange, brown, chartreuse, mauve, maroon, yellow, fuchsia, and teal.  Various effects were discovered, and oil flasks were emptied to haul away the healing-related waters.  A note was also found in a lacquered cabinet, reading "FYI, borrowed a preservative bottle, brought it to Jerry's office in the Deep Tower."  There was minor concern about the implications of a "preservative" bottle.

Seventh encounter - there was a "treasure chest" drawn on the map they had found in the dungeon several sessions ago.  Intrigued, the party headed in that direction, and were waylaid by a group of zombie moktars.  Mongo commanded one to become his servant using the power of the Sword of Unlife, and the rest were handily slain and/or turned by the party.

Eighth encounter - the treasure chest was found, and was surrounded by mutilated corpses and skeletons.  Mongo commanded the zombie to open the chest, and a scything blade popped out, chopping the zombie in two.  The nature of the trap was now known, and Bunny easily circumvented it by opening the chest from behind.  A severed hand with a silver ring was found in the chest.

Ninth encounter - wolves attack on the way back from the dungeon!  Stupid, stupid wolves.

And, finally, back to Denethix to sell their meager treasure and mourn their dead henchmen.  Just kidding, nobody mourned the henchmen.

Gains: Bunny's face, peryton head, automaton statue's face, poison-coated grim reaper statue (600 gp), silver ring w/ tourmaline (600 gp)
Kills: 8 goblins, 9 bloat zombies, 1 face exchanger, 6 zombie moktars, 2 perytons, 7 wolves
Losses: "Boxer", Skwisgar, William