session recap, 5/9/2013

Mongo the Fighter (4), his henchwoman "Bunny" the Thief (3), and his soil-bearers Malazar and someone whose name I have forgotten
Gutboy the Cleric (5), his henchman Trezgar the Elf (1) and his blink dog Rufus II
George P. Burdell the Cleric (4) and his henchmen, Slick Eddie the Thief (2) and Relgar the Elf (1)

The trio gathered their henchmen and headed to the adventurer's mall in Chelmsfordshire, seeking to hire a new henchman. Mongo turned up his nose at a muscled but smelly lout, and instead chatted up a fellow in leather aviator's jacket, white shirt, jeans, and loafers.  The henchman introduced himself as William Harrison, an interdimensional refugee, who had been pushed through a magical portal while battling a Thuggee priest.

Off to the dungeon!  Highlights:

a. Investigated a tapestry that showed scenes throughout the dungeon, from thousands of years ago.  Of notable interest was a tower on the 2nd level that leads to the 5th level.  There was much remorse over selling the submersible flashlight when the video of the gold-nugget encrusted pillars beneath the subterranean lake was seen.

b. Tried to explore the temple of the Cod-Men, but were rebuked and told they weren't allowed to go there

c. Found a room with four brown translucent statues of scientists, with horrible looks of fear and eyes that tracked the party. One held a clipboard mentioning some kind of "trapezohedron" and a laser.  There was a black square mounted at eye level on the wall, that flashed red light.  Theories were proposed that it was the laser mentioned in the clipboard.

d. Found a room with a mold-covered table.  Silver dishes were pushed off at a safe distance into the water, and collected after spore clouds settled down.

e. Destroyed a bunch of bloated zombies crawling with sea worms, and looted an exquisite ivory statuette.  William Harrison shouted his battle cry - "Get off my plane!" - but was unnerved by Mongo's constant chanting of "Kali ma!".  The henchman was knocked unconscious, but Mongo was in an uncharacteristically generous mood and allowed George to use his divine healing upon the interdimensional traveler.

f. Found a temple with a blood-stained altar.  A secret compartment held a spellbook!  It was snagged

g. Pried a gem out of the forehead of a four-armed sword-wielding statue.  The swords were a trap - nobody was shocked or surprised.  Surprisingly, no one was maimed, either.

h. Found a cod-man, figured out they had wandered into the lair the back way and had desecrated the cod-man temple.  The friendly cod-man was slain and dumped down a hole so there would be no witnesses.

Leaving the dungeon, the party stumbled into a group of thugs wearing nothing but red diapers and carrying rifles.  The eight began shouting "Exterminate the brutals!" as a giant stone head floated into view from behind some trees.  Shots were fired, eye lasers pulsed, missing Mongo - and Gutboy's hold person spell paralyzed the bulk of the enemies, including the operator of the flying stone head.

The head flew slowly into the ground at an oblique angle and ground to a stop.  The paralyzed diapered thugs were slain, and the party entered the head. The lower section was filled with grain, while a ladder led up to the bridge.  There they found a bizarre bald-headed man with a moustache and beard tattooed upon his face.  The fearsome wizard Ferayn (for it was he!) was bound, and forced to reveal the secrets of flying the giant stone head.

Our session ended here, with hijinx likely to ensue.